Returning to Treatment with Thanksgiving

Hi Friends! We are back at Brigham and Women's Hospital for round 3 of treatment. We got here yesterday for an 11:30 blood draw, a 12:30 appointment with Dr. Odejide (my oncologist). Unbelievably, we were in a room by 2pm. That certainly beats the 8 hours we had to wait last time! Apparently the day after Thanksgiving is the day to get admitted. Obviously nobody wants to be in the hospital for Thanksgiving if they don't have to be, so they had a lot of discharges just before Thanksgiving and not many admissions after.

One perk of of getting admitted early is that my chemo IV bags changes will finish each day by 6:30. That's one less interruption in the middle of the night.

We were disappointed at first that my room is not on one of the Dana-Farber floors but is instead one of Brigham and Women's cancer floors. Once we got here, though, it feels like we've been missing out! This floor was just updated a couple years ago, so everything feels newer, better, and prettier. And the nursing staff even rotates occasionally between floors, so there's really no difference in care.

The end of this three week cycle will mark the halfway point of my prescribed cancer treatment. At the end of this cycle (just before cycle 4 begins), I will have a PET scan to see what effect the chemo is having. Please mark your calendars for December 14 at ~9:30am and be praying for good news. If the scans show the tumor is responding to treatment, we will proceed with the final three. If the chemo is not having the desired effect, we will reassess and have to make a course change. I don't have any information about that options are available if that's the case, but we're desperately hoping and praying that we won't need to find out! (Also, December 14 happens to be Kristen's birthday, so feel free to send along additional encouragement and birthday wishes for her!)

The kids help putting up our Thanksgiving tree. Each leaf has something for which we're thankful.

Thanksgiving carried mixed emotions. We were sad to not be able to travel to see family for the second year in a row. (Last year Thanksgiving was just a few weeks after Ruthlyn was born.) It was also a bit hard to get totally into the holiday spirit knowing I would be starting another round of treatment the next day. But once again, we were buoyed by our community of friends. We had so many friends invite us to celebrate with them. We wound up staying close to home - literally, on our block. It was so encouraging celebrating with a couple good friends and some of our kids' best friends.

Ruthlyn plays piano with her friends.

As we do each year, we took time to reflect - both as a family with our Thanksgiving tree and with friends over dinner - on the things for which we are thankful. This year, gratitude felt more tangible to me than it often does.

I'm so grateful for Kristen, who has given and given and given of herself for me and for the kids. She lives out love in motion. In the midst of her own stress and worry, and feel spread thin, she continues to care for us beyond what I could ever imagine. She embodies her vow: "for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part." (Still hoping and holding that that will be a LONG time from now!)
I'm thankful for Dr. Odejide and everyone at Dana-Farber, who have cared for us medically, emotionally, and even at times spiritually. Samuel drew a card for her that I wish I'd taken a picture of. On it he wrote "DEAR DOCTOR ODEJIDE, THANK YOU FOR TRYING TO HELP MY DADDY FEEL BETTER." (Punctuation added.)
I'm thankful for my job and my amazingly gracious coworkers and supervisors. Not only have they taken even more on to their already busy plates, but they have been so generous and flexible with time off, working from home, and ensuring I don't have to think twice about my job, pay, or benefits.
I'm thankful for our home and our landlord. There are SO many things that we would change if we could that it's easy to only see the ugly carpets or outdated cabinets. We often wish we could afford to buy our own place (and hopefully one day we will). But this apartment has been home since Kristen and I got married. We've brought all three of our children home to this little two bedroom apartment. Our steady rent in the midst of a rate boom has enabled us to make ends meet while pursuing our callings at home and at work. And this year, we're so thankful to be 15 minutes from the #4 cancer hospital in the country.
I'm thankful for our kids, who are weathering this storm. They are scared. They are insecure at times. Yes, they are resilient, but (at least the older two) will never be the same as a result of this trial. It's there trial too. But they also bring so much laughter and joy and delight to our home. I could not be prouder of who they are and who they are becoming.
I'm thankful for our families, friends, and wider community who have done so much to make sure we're taken care of. I'm thankful for our family members - my mom, my brothers, Kristen's sister and mom (and the loved ones who lived without them for a few days) - who have travelled up to take care of our kids while we're at the hospital, enabling Kristen to be present with me. I'm the dozens of people who have brought us meals or order takeout, brought us groceries, or filled in to watch our kids for an hour or three. And I'm thankful for ALL of you who are following us in our journey and thinking of us and praying constantly for us. You sustain us and keep us going.
Most of all, I'm thankful for a God who is with us - Emmanuel. A God who knows suffering and has watched loved ones suffer. A God who redeems suffering and heartache. A God who is "near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit." (Psalm 34:18) Who am I that God should be mindful of me? I think of my Catholic friends, who before receiving the Eucharist each Mass declare in abject humility declare: “Lord, I am not worthy that you should enter under my roof, but only say the word and my soul shall be healed.” (Matt. 8:5-13) We aren't worthy. But God is infinitely, benevolently gracious.